cage state | noun | demonstrating wild and possibly deranged excitement over the seventeenth century pronouncements of the Synod of the Canons of Dordt in the Netherlands. These pronouncements are often referred to as the five points of Calvinism and, once a person becomes convinced that these five points are true, he or she enters the dreaded “cage stage.” The novice Calvinist is considered “armed and dangerous” during this period, which has been known to extend to six months, but in more serious cases can last up to ten years or longer.
Symptoms include: high fever that results in delirious incoherence of thought and speech; vomiting spasms brought on when anyone mentions “free will” or “asking Jesus into their heart” or the dreaded philosophy of Jacob Arminius; restlessness, especially during church services, when the sufferer goes more than an hour without hearing the TULIP’s five bells ringing in their ears; and diahrrea of the mouth, where uncontrollable spasms of verbal nonsense put everyone within earshot at risk.
The recommended treatment is complete isolation, restriction of movement and speech, until the symptoms pass. Unfortunately, this treatment is rarely sought by the afflicted person, so family and friends are often left to suffer silently. The only person who can reach the cage stage victim is a more experienced Calvinist, because the victim’s state of mind does not permit trust in any others. Please DO NOT attempt intervention without consulting an expert.
–Thin Edge, “Defining the ‘Cage Stage’ of Calvinism“
Let’s admit, however, that sometimes, upon first becoming Reformed some folk become jerks. Sometimes this phase is temporary. Mike Horton calls this the “cage phase,” when a new convert to Reformed Christianity needs to be put in a cage until he matures. Some, when they first discover “the doctrines of grace” (code for unconditional predestination and justification by grace alone, through faith alone) can actually become angry that they’ve been denied these truths for so long.
–R. Scott Clark, “Why (Some) Reformed People Are Such Jerks“
A lot of new and ignorant Calvinists need to… well, shut up. I know that isn’t the politest phrase in the book, but it is the truth. Most of the damage done in these matters is done by people who are in what Calvinists call the “cage phase,” those inaugural few months when you know very little except some version of TULIP and you won’t be quiet about that. These are people who need to get a very large stack of books and get some roots going, but instead they go and pick a fight with whoever is least likely to understand what they are talking about. These converts- often impressionable students or very unread laity- can be obnoxious, immature and thoughtless in their assaults. They’ve done a lot of damage and there is no apologizing for them. I would say they should be recognized for what they are- untaught, ignorant, and often, young. Most them will grow out of it. A few remain that way until their next phase.
–Michael Spencer
Within the Reformed world, a phrase which more of us should be aware of is ‘cage stage.’ Whenever someone comes into new-found truth (and this often happens with those first coming to embrace Reformed theology), the phrase refers to that period of time where the new (and usually young) convert should be locked up in a cage. That period of time is usually about two years. Of course, there are some pitiful cases that should never be let out, and there are many more evangellyfish who do not ever need to be locked up. But cage stagers, however many of them there are, can do a lot of damage. Ironically, they do much to make the theology they profess to love obnoxious to outsiders. Paul did teach, unambiguously, the doctrine of election. But he also told the Colossians, as the elect of God, to put on tender mercies.
–Douglas Wilson, “Hither and Yon”



“The law is divine and holy. Let the law have his glory, but yet no law, be it never so divine and holy, ought to teach me that I am justified, and shall live through it. I grant it may teach me that I ought to love God and my neighbour; also to live in chastity, soberness, patience, etc., but it ought not to show me, how I should be delivered from sin, the devil, death, and hell.



